40 percent orgasm gap: the stark reality of straight sex in Australia in 2025
This National Orgasm Day (July 31st), the Australian ecommerce company Adulttoymegastore is pulling back the covers on a very simple question: when did the orgasm gap between heterosexual men and women become a canyon?
New data from Australia’s leading adult retailer’s 2025 National Orgasm Day Survey reveals a startling truth across Australasia. While only 55 percent of heterosexual women say they orgasm during partnered sex, a whopping 94 percent of men say the same. That’s a 40 percent orgasm gap.
Technically speaking, this means men are finishing 71 percent more often than women. And yes, it’s very much a heterosexual problem.
“The issue isn’t about gender or anatomy – it’s about what we prioritise in the bedroom,” says Adulttoymegastore’s Certified Sex Educator, Emma Hewitt-Johnson.
“The basis of sex was built around prioritising male pleasure, and so for decades, sex has been scripted as something that ends when the man finishes. It’s outdated, it’s lazy, and it leaves a lot of people – mainly women – deeply unsatisfied.”
But there’s hope, with queer relationships showing us what’s possible when pleasure is mutual and communication is the norm. In the same survey, 76 percent of women who have sex with women, and 86 percent of men who have sex with men, say they always or usually orgasm during partnered sex.
“This shows us that the biggest sex organ is still the brain – and some people just know how to use theirs better,” says Hewitt-Johnson. “When pleasure is mutual and partners are attentive to each other’s needs, orgasm equality can be the norm, not the exception.”
And if the bar’s on the floor, sex toys might just be the secret to raising it.
Across Australasia, it appears that we’re not quite as sexually satisfied as we could be, with 40 percent of people saying they’re not getting off as often as they’d like – and it’s not solo pleasure that’s the issue.
Yet again, this dissatisfaction seems to come back to partnered sex, where perhaps having three in the bed is exactly what the doctor ordered.
Nearly half of women say they find it easier to orgasm when using adult toys during partnered sex. That tracks, given clitoral stimulation is still too often treated as a bonus, despite previous studies revealing that only 18 percent of women are able to climax from penetration alone.
“Outercourse is just as important as intercourse, and toys are one of the easiest, most-effective ways of incorporating this more” says Hewitt-Johnson. “They’re not a crutch, they’re a game-changer.”
“There’s something to be said about pleasure for pleasure’s sake – orgasms are not the only goal of sex. But, it does become an issue when we fall back into the tired trope that female orgasms are too ‘elusive’ as a means for justifying unfulfilling sex.”
“Orgasms aren’t rare gems to be earned! They’re a basic part of healthy, enjoyable sex. With the right tools, attitude, and a healthy dose of enthusiasm, there’s no reason women shouldn’t be having just as many – if not more – orgasms than men.”
The National Orgasm Day 2025 survey was carried out in July 2025 by 1500 respondents across New Zealand and Australia.
